Sunday, December 29, 2013

Goodbye Earl

I'm a Classical music type of guy, not much into Country and Western, Rap or Popular music, but I do have a few pieces that I like. I also have a few pieces of C & W, Rap, etc. that I DO NOT care for at all and “Goodbye Earl” by the Dixie Chicks is one of them. Now, the song itself is not bad, it's just the way they say goodbye to Earl.

In the song Mary Ann and Wanda are BFFs throughout high school and when they graduate Mary Ann heads of to the big city and Wanda marries Earl. Wrong move for Wanda because Earl is a wife beater which of course is way wrong. Earl puts Wanda into intensive care and Mary Ann come back home from Atlanta with a vengeance. The two girls decide that bad ass “Earl has to die.” Fine, the guy deserves it; go to it girls.

In the South, including Virginia where I live, there are just certain foods you should never mess with – they are sacred to the South. You don't mess with the family Fried Chicken recipe, change the ingredients for your Mama's Gumbo, drink your Ice Tea without sugar and you DON'T poison a man's Black-eye Peas. You just don't do it! Poison his coffee, milk, mash potatoes and gravy, but, never his Black-eye Peas! Come on, it's just not right.

But that's just how Mad Mary Ann and Wicked Wanda do poor Earl to dirt – they poison his peas. Poor Earl . . .. not the way for a bad Southern boy to go. Then the girls bundle him up, put him in the trunk of their car and head off to LA to party down. Of course the Police want to pick him up for battery on Wanda but can't find him and soon everybody forgets about old Earl.

Not me! I think they should find Earl's body, see how he was Black-eye Pea murdered and throw Mary Ann and Wanda into jail for a few years. Charge? Cooking poisoned Black-eye Peas in the South!

So if you need to do away with an Earl please use something else to poison him with. Please leave the man's Black-eye Peas alone. Please.